First Thoughts

So, for the last 12 years of my life I've been struggling with this internal question. It's been a huge war inside my brain that I've never been able to let anyone in on (mostly due to fear). So here's a little background.

Part 1: I am a 23 year old male in the United States and I am sexually aroused by "diapers". Not in a pedophilic kinda way, but I'm aroused by wearing diapers and by pictures/videos/etc. of others wearing them. The desire to "wear" has been floating in my mind for years. I first recall it coming up when I was 12 years old or so (maybe before). I wasn't sexually abused or anything. No sort of "childhood trauma" or anything of the sort, I think it first arose from curiosity. I mean I wet the bed when I was younger and remember having to wear training pants, but all kids go through that at somepoint, right?

Part 2: I grew up in a Christian home (don't let me lose you here. If you don't by into Christianity or religion or anything just bear with me). I was raised going to church and very active in my youth group all throughout middle school, high, and into college. I became a "believer" around the age of 11 although I may have not fully realized what that meant. At that point on I had dedicated my life and the way I lived to God and based how I might live my life off of biblical standards and things I had learned in church. Going to college I kinda fell away from God in my first two semesters, experimenting with alcohol and drugs. Some people may argue that's not a "bad thing" but for me it was and it was ruining my life. I was figuratively "slapped in the face" by an old friend who talked me out of the dark road I was walking and decided to come back on board with God. I then began to take my faith more seriously, got involved in campus ministry, and to this day am still actively serving in my church as well as pursing personal ministry in my community.

The Dilemma: So here is the thing I've always fought to answer (aka avoided looking for an answer). Is my desire to wear diapers a bad thing? Is it unnatural to be aroused by this? Does this go along with my Christian faith? Can I still wear diapers AND be a Christian? ...These questions made me so uncomfortable and honestly ashamed of myself. I couldn't really figure this out! I searched everywhere online and I couldn't find a good answer. Some people argued it wasn't an issue, while others argued that I needed to rid myself of it. But no one could back up their points.

I am very familiar with the Bible (hopefully this doesn't sound too self-righteous) and it's teachings. While searching for an answer I was unable to find any person that brought up sound Biblical advice on the so called "issue". So, I sought it out on my own.

The Point: So what's the point of this blog? Well, I'm 99.99% sure that there is someone else out there like me. Searching hard for the answer and stumbling along the way. My hope for this blog is that amidst my search for the answer through scripture and Biblical values, I can help someone else find the same answer I've been looking for all these years.

The following discussion probably won't be comfortable, and I might say something that offends you. You might not agree with my opinion or interpretation of the scriptures, BUT I encourage you to hear me out and CHECK IT OUT FOR YOURSELF. Read the Bible, study it yourself and see what God shows you.

If you aren't a Christian, I'm glad you're here. I'm not here to convert you or shove the Bible down your throat. I AM here to to talk or answer any questions you may have. Hopefully I can at least point you in the right direction.


Thanks for visiting and thanks for reading this far! I hope and pray that every person that comes in contact with this blog is positively affected by the words here (myself included). I can't wait to see what comes from this blog and the relationships formed because of it.

Sincerely,

A Recovering Diaper Lover

Is It Right?

Is it wrong to wear diapers as a Christian? This whole conversation is from the assumption that said person does not medically need diapers, are not incontinent, and are wearing by choice/and or desire. Most of us would argue things like, "I'm not idolizing it", "I'm not hurting anyone", or "I'm not making it sexual". If you find yourself doing one of the above, idolizing, hurting someone, or making it a sexual thing one might find it hard to argue that the action is not sinful. But, if you can say the above statements truthfully then they are fair arguments. Right?

Well maybe there is more to it than that.

I would propose that the question is not "is it wrong?" but "is it right". What I mean by this is this: Is this really bringing me and others closer to God? Before Jesus is arrested we find him praying for his current disciples and future followers (US!). In John 17:11 we get a sneak peak into what Jesus himself wanted for us in the long run. He prayed that we "may be one as we (God and Jesus) are one." All Jesus wanted for us was to become one with him and his father. To become right with him, become righteous and set apart from our old sin nature.

Sin nature is our natural tendency to seek things of the "world" instead of God. ie. Adam and Eve wanted to be like God and see things like him so they disobeyed his command. I don't think many if any in the ABDL community could say that they don't wear diapers for some sort of self serving gratification. Whether its a feel good thing, for a psychological comfort, a physical turn on, or even laziness, I think it could be safe to argue that this would be a self serving action. In Galatians 5:24 Paul states that "Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires." Long story short when we become a Christian, and dedicate or life to God, we have been spiritually put to death and God has given us a new life and a fresh start (see Galatians 2:20). When we make that initial decision we are beginning the process of being made new (2 Cor 5:17). Becoming a Christ follower is not a "free ticket to heaven card" but a call to action (don't get me wrong you get to go to heaven which is pretty sweet). Jesus doesn't say "thanks for following me guys its been a fun time! See ya!". He says go! (Matt 28:19)

I would argue that all sin is rooted in selfishness anyway. For me, and probably most, wearing diapers is a selfish thing. BUT God's call to us is not to "do whatever makes you happy". Instead Paul tells us,

^"31 So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. ³² Do not cause anyone to stumble, whether Jews, Greeks or the church of God— ³³ even as I try to please everyone in every way. For I am not seeking my own good but the good of many, so that they may be saved."

Now there is a lot there so lets break it down. First off, is this decision for the glory of God or to serve yourself?  Secondly, EVEN if you might still say, "Hey I'm the exception, I can do this thing without sinning", are you possibly causing others to stumble? Is your encouragement or support for the ABDL community causing someone else to sin? Oh yeah. I am asking you to think about other people. Not so easy, BUT we have to, especially as all Christians are called to make disciples of all nations right? (aka The Great Commission). How are we to teach others about God and him rescuing them from their sin if we are dragging them further down the black hole of sin?

So ask yourself again, "Is it right?"